Friday, January 4, 2008

Your Eagles GM on Crack

Tom Heckert thinks no major changes are necessary

Starting this week, on Fridays I'll give you a special called the Weekly Wrap-Up. It is what it is, my funny take on the big topic or topics in weekly sports.

This week I'll focus on the Eagles' GM Tom Heckert.

This is your GM of the Philadelphia Eagles Tom Heckert.

This is your GM on crack.

Clearly, he's not right in the head judging from his interview with Rueben Frank.

Those of you who are fans of the show Deadwood, you'll see where I'm going with this. Tom Heckert's interview with Frank reminds me of the scene where Al was interrogating Jimmy the drug addict and complained of the "cat piss smell."

Reading this interview, you'd think the Eagles were in the playoffs. Hell, you'd think they went 13-3 and have a first round bye like the Packers and Cowboys. Heckert must be smoking the rock if he thinks this team isn't in need of changes. Even Howard Eskin think this team needs a lot of changes!

Heckert even had the guts to say Jevon Kearse is still a good player when healthy.

Just imagine if Al Swearengen were in the room with Heckert.

Al: So, this Kearse c***sucker, we're gonna get rid of him right?

Heckert: Well, no Al. I think he's still effective when healthy.

Al: You've gotta be s**ting me you little c***sucker. The smell of cat piss in this room is overwhelming.

Heckert: Well, I am a little nervous.

Al: Nervousness, doesn't cause that. Lying causes cat piss smell Heckert. Now, throw yourself off this balcony into that mud pit you little c***sucker and stay down there until I come down!

Angelo Cataldi said it right this morning (and I don't agree with him much). Heckert is nothing more than a glorified PR man for the Eagles.

He's set to interview with the Falcons on Sunday for their vacant GM position.

Don't let the door hit you in the ass if you leave Heckert.

And, lay off the crack too Tommy boy!

You'll be looking like this guy soon if you keep smoking that (expletive deleted).


Anonymous said...

LOL. I love the pics man! Heckert must be smoking crack to think they're close!

Inside the Iggles said...

Funny stuff. I just hope that he doesn't actually beleive this. If he does then pray Atlanta offers him the GM job there.